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I had been invited to a local country fair by someone I hadn't really expected to get asked by. It's one thing to go to a fair with a friend, but quite another to go to a fair with a mad scientist! You see, Raven wanted to conduct some experiments. She wanted to see if she could analyze the DNA of swine in order to turn men into pigs like the mythical Circe. For some reason or another, manipulating the DNA of pigs wasn't as easy as that of regular animals. I came with her mainly because I needed a good misadventure. I wandered into the dusty fair with Raven, as she looked about for perfect specimens. She wore her usual white lab-coat, as she felt that it's best to look professional wherever she went.

"This is going to be great! Once I have the DNA required to turn men into pigs, then I'll have the perfect tool to ward off those Men In Black guys who keep sniffing around my lab!" I sighed, as I scratched at my head. "And let me guess, I'll be your test subject right?" She nodded her head excitedly, "Well, I have plenty of test subjects to turn into Pokémon, I need more subjects that I can turn into regular animals! You don't mind, do you?" I shook my head, "I get turned into animals, or swapped with ones all the time. I'm used to it, just don't keep me as a pig for too long!"

She laughed, as she turned towards me. "It depends on if you turn into a piglet or not! If you become a piglet, I may decide to keep you as a pet for a month or two!" I frowned, as I hung my head. "Please, tell me you're joking! I just spent a whole month as a rabbit, I can't be trapped as a pig for that long!" She giggled, as she removed a syringe from her lab-coat. "Relax, I was just kidding! Now, go have some fun while I find some pigs to expunge DNA from!" She ran off excitedly, as I began to tour the fairgrounds.

The place was littered with numerous rednecks, who gawked at various contests that were placed around the area. Everything from banjo-playing to pie-eating, these rednecks just loved the festivities to an unnatural degree. It was almost sickening, to the point where I couldn't take it anymore. As I stumbled about the fair, I eventually came across the blue-ribbon contest. There was a huge podium, that sat in front of a fenced-in area filled with pigs. The sweaty swine bashed into each other, as they trotted around their designated area. I hated pigs, especially when they're involved in these dumb and pointless redneck contests. I hated it so much, that I decided to put together a plan to spice things up a bit.

I had a couple of body-swap capsules in my pockets, special pills that allow two beings to swap bodies for a whole day. I noticed that one of the judges for this dumb contest was an extremely attractive female redneck. I decided that I'd toss one of the pills into her glass of water, eat the other one, and then ruin the contest using her body! I'll use her body to give everyone bad scores, and try to jeopardize the contest at each turn! I reached into my pocket and pulled out of the capsules, I quickly tossed into my gaping maw and swallowed it.

Now I just had to toss the other pill into her glass of water, then I can ruin this whole competition! Just when I was about to make my move, something smashed into me from behind. I fell over onto the ground, nearly landing on my face in the process. The pill toppled out of my pocket, and landed right in front of the being that just knocked me down. It was a giant fat pig, one of the fattest pigs I had ever seen! This thing must've been over 300 pounds, it was just enormous! The pig glanced down at the pill I dropped, causing me to panic.

"No, don't eat that! Whatever you do, don't eat that!" If that pig ate the pill, then I'd be stuck in his body for the whole day! I stood up, and tried to stop the pig. Before I could get to him, the pig moved his head towards the ground and lapped up the pill. In an instant, my body became numb and my mind became frazzled. I had problems rationalizing thoughts, and focusing on what was going on. I focused myself, and tried to concentrate. As my vision blurred, so did all of the feeling in my body.

When the feeling came back, I was in for a shock. My body felt, extremely fat! I could feel my massive flabby folds dangle off of my body, like some sort of fleshy encumbrance. My body was perched on all fours, and my fingers and toes were completely numb and I couldn't move them in the least! I felt as though there was something in their place, something hard and rigid. I took a step, as I heard a loud clacking sound. The sound was extremely large, as if my ear had enhanced to superhuman degrees. My ears were large and floppy, and very sensitive to any form of nearby sound. My nose was large as well, it was bulky and circular. It took in several scents that were foreign to me, yet very much alluring. My nose went wild with a flurry of scents. I wish I could say the same of my eyesight, which was faded and unclear. Colors weren't represented well, and everything was out of focus. It had been pushed out in front of my face, as if someone had stretched my face out to an insane degree. My body was entirely naked, my clothing had vanished. Instead, I had a large coat of fat that made me hot. Almost too hot, to the point where each step I took would cause me to sweat.

Something was wriggling on my backside, it felt like some weird sort of spring that happened to be attached to me. I found that if I focused my nerves a little, I could wiggle the spring around a bit. I had a hard time figuring out what was going on, my mind was feeling somewhat hazy. That's when I remembered that I took the extra-strength version of the pill, the one that instilled memories and personality traits of the two engaged in the body-swap into the other person. Despite my memory being hazy and my knowledge being dimmed, I had a firm idea of what was going on. I had swapped bodies with a pig, an extremely fat pig!

As soon as I had this thought, it just as quickly vanished. My mind became muddled, as I thought only of food and wallowing in the mud. As my mind wallowed in the mud, I took notice of someone walking in front of me. He crouched down, and I found that I immediately recognized his face! It was me! At least, I think it was me. I couldn't remember what I looked like as a human, and I could barely remember being human in the first place. "Yes! I swapped bodies with a human! I don't care if it's temporary, I'll still enjoy myself! Time gorge myself on food!" My body walked over to the back of me, wound up and smacked me right on my sweaty rear. The motion hit me so hard, that I leapt forward and squealed out in pain.

The duplicate laughed to himself, as he walked off! I had to chase after him, but I had some trouble rationalizing my thoughts! I knew I had to focus, so I closed my eyes and began thinking deeply. I concentrated deeply, and decided to not let the body-swap remove my human-level intellect. After a few minutes, I found that I had managed to successfully hold back the degradation of my mind. It was only temporary, but I knew I couldn't let my mind slip away like this! Even if this was temporary, I'd hate to have the mind of a dirty and filthy pig all day! I decided to chase after the thief, but I was unfortunately stopped before I could start.

Two rednecks stood in front of me, and they both didn't look too happy to see me. "What've we got 'ere, cousin? It looks like one o' our hogs escaped!" Said a bucktoothed redneck, as he turned towards his cousin. "You're correct, cousin! Bacon Bits is shoe-in to win this contest, and it'd be shame for him to ditch us now!" The two rednecks slowly approached me, as I began to back away. My hooves clacked against the dirt, as the two rednecks approached me. I backed away, as I prepared to leap out of their grasp. I knew I could outsmart a couple of dirty rednecks, even as a pig! The last thing I'd want to be is a prize winning pig, I hate these stupid fat pig contests!

The men continued their approach, as I prepared to run off. Before I could, I felt someone's smooth hand grab hold of the flesh on my back. Before I could escape, I felt something sharp poke into my backside. I wanted to leap forward in pain, but I had no intention of jumping towards the two rednecks standing in front of me! "Perfect! I got the DNA!" Exclaimed a voice that I recognized as Raven's. I turned around and found her standing there while smiling, while holding a syringe full of my blood. I tried to speak and tell her who I was, but all that came out of my porky muzzle was unintelligible snorting. My oinking made her giggle, as she reached her index finger down and gave me a poke on the snout. "Lady, what you are doing to our pig?" Asked one of the rednecks. "Oh, I'm just a pig doctor! The contest judge called me in to take some blood samples from the pigs around here! I mean you no trouble."

The two rednecks turned towards each other. "Well, she uses big words and she seems nice! That means she must be on the level!" The other redneck nodded in agreement. Raven pocketed the syringe and walked off, as I stood there dumbstruck. The two rednecks leapt on me, and grabbed hold of my fat body. I struggled, but to no avail. My body was too fat and out of shape to escape from their grasp, as they gripped me tightly. After a while, I gave up struggling and let them lead me back to the pen holding all of the other pigs. I was lead into the fenced in area, which was promptly shut behind me. All of the numerous pigs drove me nuts, with their constant squealing and snorting. They bashed their sweaty bodies into mine, as I felt myself get smashed on all sides.

The constant barrage of fat pigs smashing into me, combined with the sweaty and filthy nature of it all caused me to lose my composure and my mind. My human mind slowly faded every time another pig bashed into me. After one bash I had forgotten how to count and after two bashes I had forgotten was a human being was. My mind slowly eroded, as this barrage of swine prepared me for the contest. My mind faded away, until it was as dull as a potato. I stood there with my dulled mind, as I snorted. I cared only about getting out of here, and eating food. Mating would also be a fun pastime, but that can wait. When will those farmer-creatures be done with this pig herding thing?

I hunger for food now, and I must satiate myself! After what seemed like an eternity of waiting, the judges begin bringing us out onto the stage. One pig after another was marched onto the stage, as each one was weighed on a large scale. I was one of the final ones to be called. "Bacon Bits!" Shouted one of the judges. Upon hearing my name, I hobbled up to the front of the gate, as I was let onto the stage. I was moved over to the large scale and was promptly weighed. Apparently, the farmer-creatures were astounded by my weight! They cheered as they looked at the scale! I couldn't understand what the scale said, I had no clue on what it meant! I assumed that I'd be getting some sort of reward for this!

A judge came and put a large blue ribbed against the fold of fat on my neck. I snorted proudly, as I noticed two people in the back. One was a woman in a white lab-coat, and the other had brown hair and word a blue shirt. "You usually don't eat this much, James. Some girl break your heart?" I heard the woman say from just out of earshot. "Well, I just like to eat! Is that a problem?" It didn't matter what the two were doing, I could really care less. They seemed familiar, but all I cared about at the moment was food!

The farmer-creatures came and helped me off of the stage, leading me past the numerous people standing around. I was lead to the back of a farm truck, at which point I was loaded in by a couple of farmers. The farmers pushed my fat body into the back of the vehicle, and closed the gate behind me. I snorted happily, as the vehicle began to drive back to the farm. The vehicle drove for what must've been several hours. I was so very hungry, uncontrollably hungry! The world became hazy, as I continued to snort and squeal. I just wanted to eat! I was so hungry! So very... Full? My stomach felt as though it was ready to burst!

Feeling returned to me, as I looked around. I was in Raven's car, as we drove down the highway! "You finally awake, James?" She asked, as I stared at her. "Yeah, I'm fin---" I stopped in mid-sentence, as I looked down at my shirt. My gut was sticking out making me look pregnant! That's impossible, I couldn't have gained that much weight already! I lifted my shirt and noticed my belly was pink. "I hope you don't mind, but I injected you with the pig DNA already! Lucky you, you're going to turn into a copy of the prize-winning pig Bacon Bits!" I sighed, as I put my hands in my face.

Not again! I had just been Bacon Bits for a whole day, and now I was going to turn into him again! The car drove down the highway, as the changes took hold of me. I became fatter, my ears became floppy, and a curly tail popped out of my backside. By the time we reached Raven's house, I had become a full pig! My clothes were stretched to ripping capacity, as they gripped my hefty folds. I hopped out of the vehicle, as did Raven. "Alright, since the lab is full of Pokémon, I'm going to need you to stay in the backyard! Our dog was taken to the cabin by a friend, so you don't have to worry about sharing! Come along, Bacon Bits!" She shouted as she gave a smack on the backside. I wandered into the yard and looked about. The yard was filled with distilled colors and odd sounds. This was the worst day ever! Not only did I get entered into that stupid pig contest and win, but now I'm still stuck as that pig! Can't a man catch a break?
:iconraiinbowraven: and I head to a country fair for some science! Little did I know, I would get roped into participating in the blue-ribbon contest... As a contestant! Rainbow drew the amazing artwork! Raven belongs to raiinbowraven, please support her content! I finished another unfinished story, yay! Also, my views... They're over 8000!!!
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:iconchocolatedragon-fly:
Chocolatedragon-fly Featured By Owner Mar 7, 2014
You are not a happy pig are you :)
Reply
:iconmonkey-scientist:
Monkey-Scientist Featured By Owner Mar 7, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
I'd be a lot happier if you fed me some apple cores. :)
Reply
:iconchocolatedragon-fly:
Chocolatedragon-fly Featured By Owner Mar 7, 2014
And got you a mate  :)
Reply
:iconmonkey-scientist:
Monkey-Scientist Featured By Owner Mar 7, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
A mate?! Woah, things might be going too fast! I just got tossed into this body yesterday! :D
Reply
:icondragonboytf:
Dragonboytf Featured By Owner Mar 7, 2014
Cool ^^
Reply
:iconmonkey-scientist:
Monkey-Scientist Featured By Owner Mar 7, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks.
Reply
:icondragonboytf:
Dragonboytf Featured By Owner Mar 7, 2014
I see why you're not the happiest of your kind :3
Reply
:iconmonkey-scientist:
Monkey-Scientist Featured By Owner Mar 7, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Wallowing in the mud does get boring after a while. At least the apple cores are nice. :)
Reply
:icondragonboytf:
Dragonboytf Featured By Owner Mar 7, 2014
*nomnomnom*
Reply
:iconmonkey-scientist:
Monkey-Scientist Featured By Owner Mar 7, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
I hope you're not planning on eating me! :D
Reply
:icondragonboytf:
Dragonboytf Featured By Owner Mar 8, 2014
No...

*shyly stalks away*
Reply
:iconmonkey-scientist:
Monkey-Scientist Featured By Owner Mar 8, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
That's right! I'm not going to end up on anyone's dinner plate tonight! XD
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconfirepikachu123:
firepikachu123 Featured By Owner Feb 26, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reply
:iconmonkey-scientist:
Monkey-Scientist Featured By Owner Feb 26, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks, man.
Reply
:iconfirepikachu123:
firepikachu123 Featured By Owner Feb 26, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
you are welcome
Reply
:iconcentaur1998:
Centaur1998 Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Nice story!
Reply
:iconmonkey-scientist:
Monkey-Scientist Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
*Oink* Thanks!
Reply
:iconraiinbowraven:
RaiinbowRaven Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2014  Professional Digital Artist
haahaa~ dont worry friend the experiment was a success~ Ill have to work on returning you to normal~
Reply
:iconmonkey-scientist:
Monkey-Scientist Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
*Snort* It better be soon, I'm sick of rolling around in the mud! :)
Reply
:iconraiinbowraven:
RaiinbowRaven Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2014  Professional Digital Artist
Great story btdubs~ I really enjoyed it! ^_^
Reply
:iconmonkey-scientist:
Monkey-Scientist Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Btdubs? Whazzat?
Reply
:iconraiinbowraven:
RaiinbowRaven Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2014  Professional Digital Artist
haha btdubs=btw=by the way~ its some dumb thing my friends and i like to say xD
Reply
:iconmonkey-scientist:
Monkey-Scientist Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Oh, ok! LOL I thought you gave me some kind of nickname there.
Reply
:icontjboomer83:
tjboomer83 Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2014
one very funny story james. the ending was the best part i thought
Reply
:iconmonkey-scientist:
Monkey-Scientist Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Yeah, gotta love how I get stuck as a pig directly after I return to normal. I had a lot of fun writing this! I hadn't done a pig body-swap yet, so I thought it was about time!
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:iconneerioen:
Neerioen Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2014
Good story as always :)
Reply
:iconmonkey-scientist:
Monkey-Scientist Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks, man! I had a lot of fun writing myself turning into a pig *Oink* :)
Reply
:iconcallmedale:
callmedale Featured By Owner Feb 23, 2014  Hobbyist Artist
The pigs are often the cleanest animals at a fair and are rarely kept for breeding after a show unless they are a female from a long line bred for showing most are just sold almost immediately after the shows 

But good story nonetheless 
Reply
:iconmonkey-scientist:
Monkey-Scientist Featured By Owner Feb 23, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks! I'm glad you liked it. I edited out the breeding bits, because I actually wasn't a big fan of that part to begin with.
Reply
:iconcallmedale:
callmedale Featured By Owner Feb 23, 2014  Hobbyist Artist
Actually with all the work I've done with pigs and pork in my life I found that part more comedic than serious 
Reply
:iconmonkey-scientist:
Monkey-Scientist Featured By Owner Feb 23, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Wow, you must know a lot about pigs! I'm surprised that this didn't offend you, considering I must've gotten so many elements of pig farming wrong.
Reply
:iconcallmedale:
callmedale Featured By Owner Feb 23, 2014  Hobbyist Artist
Nah 

I had a good laugh
Reply
:iconmonkey-scientist:
Monkey-Scientist Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Yeah, I tend to be a pretty funny writer.
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